It was one of those rolling, strolling,
conversational afternoons in the pub. Percy, Scott, Iain and myself had done a fair old
stitch-up on the well-loved trilogy - This, That, and The Other. Glasses tinkled to
accompany our convivial banter, and cider, lager and gin all found their way down the
correct throats. And the background music was, for once, in the background where it
belongs.
But, just like the ballroom-dancing
passengers on the very Titanic itself, we had no idea whatever how completely our lives
were about to alter - with one simple question apparently plucked out of cyberspace
itself.
Have you read Zen and the Art of Motorcycle
Maintenance? And do you remember how Phaedra's depression began? The depression that was
to reduce him to near catatonia for a year? It was nothing more dramatic than his teaching
colleague innocently remarking...."I hope you're teaching them Quality."
For us it was Percy what done it. "Why do you
need an internet service provider?" he very reasonably asked. "Why can ye no
just dial up the internet?" Here big P did a demonstration of dialling on the phone.
Press, press, press on the bar counter.
It was a very good question, to which, it
has to be said, no one present appeared to know the answer. Nor do they yet. As neither do
I. And we're still searching.
So, dudes: if anybody out there knows the
truth, then do please email and I'll pass
your nuggets on to the widest possible readership.
Q: Why is an ISP needed to browse on the World
Wide Web?
Magnum of bubbly to the clearest, most concise
answer as usual. Thirty words maximum, and no techie talk whatsoever.
Wednesday morning possums, and the magnificat
household is buzzing with what's come to be known as the PERCY QUESTION. After having a heated
debate with Thing, my paying guest, we settled on the following problems, which we then
attempted to answer.
1. What is the telephone service?
2. What does a browser do?
3. What is the WWW?
4. How does it relate to FTP, hyperterminal, and other such niceties?
And I must say "Thank you, Thing, for your
input to this vexed matter. Unfortunately yours truly has to go and earn an honest crust
for the next few hours, but more later. Let me leave you with the following thought ---
You do NOT dial up anyone on your phone. The only
connection you have is to the green box somewhere in the street outside your house, and it
is open the moment you pick up your handset. That is all that there is, and all of your
conversations are in one sense with that green box.
